A New Year

Happy New Year!

I'm excited to see what this year brings.

Good and Bad

The good thing about having pets is the love you get and get to give.

The bad thing is when they are old and ready to leave us.

Think good thoughts for my boys. We are having a really hard time at our house today.

And We Wouldn't Have It Any Other Way

My sister Noel just called. Her youngest son Reid is throwing up. My oldest Alex said, "but of course. It's Christmas.. and if someone wasn't throwing up, it just wouldn't be right."

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Lovely

Things I've Done

Things I’ve Done (In Red)
1. Started my own blog
2. Slept under the stars
3. Played in a band
4. Visited Hawaii
5. Watched a meteor shower
6. Given more than I can afford to charity
7. Been to Disneyland/world
8. Climbed a mountain
9. Held a praying mantis
10. Sung a solo
11. Bungee jumped
12. Visited Paris
13. Watched lightning at sea
14. Taught myself an art from scratch
15. Adopted a child
16. Had food poisoning
17. Walked to the top of the Statue of Liberty
18. Grown my own vegetables
19. Seen the Mona Lisa in France
20. Slept on an overnight train
21. Had a pillow fight
22. Hitchhiked
23. Taken a sick day when you’re not ill
24. Built a snow fort
25. Held a lamb
26. Gone skinny dipping
27. Run a marathon
28. Ridden in a gondola in Venice
29. Seen a total eclipse
30. Watched a sunrise or sunset
31. Hit a home run
32. Been on a cruise
33. Seen Niagara Falls in person
34. Visited the birthplace of my ancestors
35. Seen an Amish community
36. Taught myself a new language
37. Had enough money to be truly satisfied
38. Seen the Leaning Tower of Pisa in person
39. Gone rock climbing
40. Seen Michelangelo’s David
41. Sung karaoke
42. Seen Old Faithful geyser erupt
43. Bought a stranger a meal at a restaurant
44. Visited Africa
45. Walked on a beach by moonlight
46. Been transported in an ambulance
47. Had my portrait painted
48. Gone deep sea fishing
49. Seen the Sistine Chapel in person
50. Been to the top of the Eiffel Tower in Paris
51. Gone scuba diving or snorkeling
52. Kissed in the rain
53. Played in the mud
54. Gone to a drive-in theater
55. Been in a movie
56. Visited the Great Wall of China
57. Started a business
58. Taken a martial arts class
59. Visited Russia
60. Served at a soup kitchen
61. Sold Girl Scout Cookies
62. Gone whale watching
63. Got flowers for no reason
64. Donated blood, platelets or plasma
65. Gone sky diving
66. Visited a Nazi Concentration Camp
67. Bounced a check
68. Flown in a helicopter
69. Saved a favorite childhood toy
70. Visited the Lincoln Memorial
71. Eaten caviar
72. Pieced a quilt
73. Stood in Times Square
74. Toured the Everglades
75. Been fired from a job
76. Seen the Changing of the Guards in London
77. Broken a bone
78. Been on a speeding motorcycle
79. Seen the Grand Canyon in person
80. Published a book
81. Visited the Vatican
82. Bought a brand new car
83. Walked in Jerusalem
84. Had my picture in the newspaper
85. Read the entire Bible
86. Visited the White House
87. Killed and prepared an animal for eating
88. Had chickenpox
89. Saved someone’s life
90. Sat on a jury
91. Met someone famous
92. Joined a book club
93. Lost a loved one
94. Had a baby
95. Seen the Alamo in person
96. Swam in the Great Salt Lake
97. Been involved in a lawsuit
98. Owned a cell phone
99. Been stung by a bee
100. Rode an elephant

TGIF

That is all. Ü

And...

if you have a blog...how about an update?

Ü

OMG

...I am tired.

I was thinking about how much energy I spend worrying about things that never happen.

Perhaps I wouldn't be so tired.

Bliss

What a great break this has been. Some presents have been bought. The tree is up and decorated. Movies have been watched. Games, football & basketball have been watched. Sweaters have been worked on. Books have been read. Music listened to. Laundry caught up. House cleaned. Bread baked. Naps taken.

And I have 2 more days!!!!!!

Pride and Joy

I am happy.
I am tired.
I am home.
I am looking forward to tomorrow.
I have a good book to read.
I have a roof over my head that is mine.
I can sing.
I can hear.
I can walk.
I can love.

And So

it begins.

I have been anticipating and dreading this week since August. I have so many mixed feelings about this week.

I'm going to try to just enjoy and be in the moment and remember to have some quiet time to reflect.

I Forgot!

I just finished "Twlight" and am already into "New Moon". I love a good book. Even more, I love a good series!

Exciting

Alex met before the scouting board of review Tuesday night and was awarded the rank of Eagle Scout! I am so so so proud of him!

One of his letters for the board of review had some misinformation in it. They asked Alex about a trip he was cited as being on and he admitted that he didn't attend that trip, the letter was wrong. The board complimented him on his honesty and integrity. Yeah Alex!!!

Ethan has his first basketball game for middle school tonight. I'm excited to watch him play.

Aidan is plugging along. Hating cursive writing (can't say I blame him) but generally loving life.

50 Days

Yes, Christmas will be here in 50 days. Yikes!

My students and I have been talking about the upcoming Thanksgiving holiday. One of my girls has been sharing what she will do to help her mom cook. She is so cute talking about all the different dishes and how they will be prepared. Also, she told me what she will wear because it gets hot in their kitchen!

We had a great reading lesson today. My students are attentive and trying to improve their reading as fast as they can. I have so much hope for their growth and success.

YES

we can. And.... YES WE DID!!!!

History

When my dad woke me up on July 20, 1969, he told me that one day, I would be able to tell my grandchildren about the night men walked on the moon.

Tomorrow, I'm taking my children with me to vote. They will be able to tell their grandchildren about the election that began a new chapter in our history.

Good Tired

I had Deadwood practice tonight. We are recording and it's tiring singing some of the songs several times in a row.

But it's a good tired.

Dumped

I've been dumped. Recently I came across some old home videos from when youngest son was 1 1/2. Sean and I watched them in between passing out candy tonight. One was from 1999 on Halloween night.

It made me realize how much my boys have grown and yet how they are still the same. Sean & I are home alone tonight. Oldest is out with his grrlfriend, middle is at a party with his guys and youngest is out trickortreating with his gang.

Thus, my title.

Better

I feel much better today. Much.

I want to put this out there....

I am having a really hard time having a senior in high school aged son. He's ready to move out, move on and I'm not ready for it. I'm having a hard time letting go.

I'm not ready for this at all.

On happier note.... I had a former student call me last night and thank me for being there for him. Wow. And I found out that some special friends are going to have a baby. I am so happy for them and so happy that I can still see miracles happening all around me.

I'm not in a good place right now. I have a lot of heavy feelings and thoughts.

There are several things and people that I want to cut out of my life and I'm not sure how to proceed.

All I know is things can't go on the way they are going right now.

I Wish I Had

I promised myself that I would never (if possible) say I wish I had ______ . For example, I wish I had gone back to school and gotten a masters degree. Or, I wish I had been in a band.

One thing I need to change RIGHT NOW in my life is to make sure my mom knows how much I love her and appreciate everything EVERYTHING she has done for me.

I am so so sad for my co-worker. Her mom is sick and I know that must be such a helpless, terrifying place to be.

At the same time, I'm thinking that my mom could get sick and I would feel scared and sad but also so much regret over our relationship for the past several years.

So, to keep my promise to myself but most importantly because I love her.... I'm going to make sure my mom knows I love her and appreciate her.

I'm going to do it.

Really.

That One

I'm voting for "that one". John McCain called Barack Obama "that one" during the debate on Tuesday night. Michelle Obama said she wasn't offended by this comment.

I think I was offended enough for both of us.

I Hate

I don't want to but I do. I feel sick even typing this.

I hate mean people.
I hate that people don't recognize the pain and suffering that is all around them.
I hate that I do.
I hate that my children get hurt and I can't stop it.
I hate feeling powerless.
I hate knowing that I have hurt people.
I hate knowing that I will hurt someone again.

I hate.

A Mighty Big Bucket

But I don't want to give any money to the assholes that particpated in the criminal acts that got us here it the first place.

I don't want to.

Today

was difficult. Pressure, tantrums, paperwork, conflicts. Urg.

I'm so glad I'm home with my family.

Anyone else thinking it might snow this weekend?

My Boys

My boys are all happy.
My boys are all healthy.

Truly, this is all I've ever wanted.

Happy Birthday

My husband is a dear. This is what he was going to get for his birthday.

This is what he is getting instead. (sob)

Happy Birthday honey.

Fever

Nothing like getting sick to knock you out of your funk. Bleh.

Moving along... Alex got the lead in "Annie Get Your Gun". It is to be his last high school musical. He is on cloud nine. Me, not so much. I am not liking the whole growing up and leaving thing. Don't get me wrong, there are days when I'm ready for them ALL to move out (I don't like to pack or I would leave). But right now, sitting here thinking about my son growing up and away, I am in tears.

I think I have discovered the cause of my funk.

Staying Home

It's all I want to do.

I wasn't ready for summer to end.

Funk

I am in a bit of a funk. Not sure why. But I am.

I am tired.

I don't have any "me" time.

I feel inadequate. Like nothing I am doing is being done well ~ and that is something I CANNOT STAND!

I have had a headache for 3 days.

I could go on and on .... but....

I know that a good nights sleep will fix most of my funk. I need to knock the loud voice telling me I am I'm inadequate right out of my damn head.

Ibuprofen will help too.

Three Day Weekend

Pure, pure bliss.

The Veil

I've been thinking about the different types of veils and how they are used to symbolize so many different things.

One type of veil is the wedding veil. I played piano for a wedding yesterday. The bride wore a traditional veil and the groom lifted the veil to kiss his bride as instructed by the minister. The wedding was very simple and I was happy to see this tradition carried out during the service.

A second type of veil is the one that was torn in the temple when Jesus was crucified. I've been reading and reading on this topic and find it fascinating.

Another veil is the one in Order of the Phoenix that Sirius Black falls through. Harry is certain he can hear voices and can bring Sirius back if he too goes through the veil.

The last veil is the one that I wear most days. The one that I use to pretend I'm here for my own purpose and that what I'm doing is by my design. I received a very upsetting email yesterday about a man I know passing away very unexpectedly. I know this was not his choice or his design. When I read this email, my veil was ripped from in front of my face and I realized again how tenuous life is. My heart is breaking for his wife and young son, his family and his dear friends.

12, 7 & 5

I am so tired.

So. tired.

Back to School

Hmmmm. I've got so much to do, I'm not even sure where to start.

Alex got his license yesterday-ack!
My sister is ok- thank God!
My classroom is not ready-urgh.
The Cubs are on tv today- yeah!
I just got my haircut- not sure yet.!?
Ethan just got a cell phone- thank God for unlimited texting.
Aidan just got his football pads- when did he start playing football!?!?!?

Mama Mia

What a fun fun movie! Went with a great friend. Laughed, cried, and laughed some more. I will buy the soundtrack the next time I'm at the store.

That is all.

Nesting

I swear if I didn't know any better I would think I was pregnant.

It's Hot

Nothing like stating the obvious. Urgh.

In Wisconsin, the temperature got hot enough to swim and catch some rays. The nice thing though was the lack of humidity.

Spent some time at school today. Not sure how I want to set my room up yet. So, as a result, I've not moved any of my furniture except to pile it all in the middle of my room.

Am also looking for new family room furniture. Can't decide yet what I'm looking for or how I want to arrange the room. I like how it is now but feel it might be time for a change.

Anyone recognizing a theme here? Urgh.

The Dells

Our vacation was lovely. There was no fighting among the sisters until the last morning of our stay. And amazingly, I wasn't involved.

I got to sit in the sun, swim, drink a summer shandy, knit and hang out with my boys(and DH). What else could a girl want?

Am I Leaving It All On The Field?

Randy Pausch has passed away. He died last night. I loved his last lecture and in the coming days will listen to it again.

One thing he said really stuck with me... leave it all on the field.

I have, at times in my life, been afraid to do that. Afraid what others will think of me or say about me. Just typing these words makes me see how ridiculous that worry is. People are going to think and say what they want. Big deal.

Many things are changing right now and I am excited about the changes. I can see with some clarity this morning that change often brings about very good things.

Randy Pausch spoke about achieving your childhood dreams. This week while I'm on vacation, I am going to make a list and see where I'm at with my dreams.

Busy Week

Between football camp, soccer camp and job hunting... I'm pooped.

I had a work meeting this morning and another one this afternoon. Things are changing in the area of PD and our focus. I'm excited about where this will take my district.

Is it sick to say I'm looking forward to this school year?

Blackout

What a fantastic time I had doing Into the Woods. I love love love doing theater for a variety of reasons.

I love being on stage and becoming a character.
I love being around other theater people. They are so accepting and true.
I love making people smile. And think. And sometimes cry.
I love learning something about myself everytime I do a show.

He's Home

and he's safe! My BIL Liam is home from Iraq for 18 days. He called me yesterday afternoon. It was SO good to hear his voice and hear how good he sounds.

We'll get to see him hopefully early next week!

Klutz

I am a klutz. I tripped last night and knocked over a can of paint that proceeded to spill all over the concrete floor.

I should have stayed home.

And a good time

was had by all.

This weekend has been a blast. My sister came over and we spent the afternoon hanging out with people from the cast of Into the Woods. Then we went to a friends house for supper and fireworks. My husband LOVES fireworks and gets such a blast out of putting on a show it makes me happy watching him be so happy.

Yesterday, I helped my friend make costumes for the show. Alex came with and it was fun to hang out together. It makes me sad when I think about him being a senior so I try not to think about it much.(denial can be a great thing)

Today, I'm working on getting my lines down and making my cropped cardigan. I love knitting and I'm so glad I can make things to share with others. I want to find a nice yarn shop while I'm on vacation. I am on the hunt for yarn for my nieces sweater and some sock yarn for myself.

And the fun begins!

I slept until 8:30 this morning. I haven't slept that late for years. I can't even remember.....

I feel so relaxed and so happy to be home.

Diagraphs and Blends

I spent the month of June teaching a student(2 actually) all about diagraphs and blends. I am pleased with their progress and take pride in my part of the process.

Only 2 more days and the summer is all mine.

Summer School

5 more days and it's over.

And I am ready.

Today

I gave my husband a disc golf set for Father's Day. He is also getting a new gadget from the boys, but this gift, was from me. He took our two youngest sons to try it out this afternoon and they had a great time. When I got home from play practice, I heard all about throwing the discs, hopping the creek and how much they all improved their throws.

My husband grew up without a father. Well, he had a father but he wasn't a dad. His father drank(still does) and was not nurturing or a good role model. My husband is a wonderful father and a fantastic dad. Sure at times he drives me crazy (not is a love song kind-of-way, just crazy crazy) but he is a good dad. My boys are SO lucky to have him as their father and they don't even know it.

But I do.

My Friend Molly

My friend Molly got married today. Her wedding was heartfelt and full of joy. She asked me several months ago to play guitar during her wedding and I was honored to do so.

It is days like today that I am so glad my husband and I moved back to the midwest where we can know our neighbors and feel a connection with people. I loved my time out west and wouldn't trade it for the world. But I am very grateful to be where I am right now.

My 2 oldest boys stayed at the reception with me. I loved talking and dancing(!!) with both of them. They both brought me cake (with a fork!) and made the evening extra special.

There are days when I wonder why I am where I am and why I'm doing what I'm doing. Today, I know why.

Fit

Our new Wii Fit is quickly becoming my best friend. I love all the features and feel motivated to use it each day.

Those Nintendo guys really know what they're doing.

I caught him in my garden in the autumn one night.

He was robbing me.....

Ack! I'm the witch in 4 weeks! FOUR WEEKS!

My Mom

My mom retired yesterday. She has taught for 44 years.

44 years. That simply amazes me.

What is even more amazing, she wasn't really ready to retire. She said she really wanted to go one more year. You see, she still loves going to work/school/her job everyday. Still. loves. it. everyday.

Most people don't even like their job/career. My mom loves hers and was always excited to go.

My sisters and I are having a party for my mom in June. She initally wasn't sure about having a party but I insisted. Here's why... My mom wrote her friends obituary a few years ago when he passed. It was eloquent and thoughtful, full of spirit and heartfelt words. I only wished he could have heard what she had to say about him, what everyone had to say. My hope for this party is my mom will hear from people how much she has meant to them, how much she has touched them. That the world is a better place because my mom woke up happy and spent her days with teenagers talking with them about the world and what they can do to change it.

Most people complain about the world and its problems. I am proud to say my mom is one person who talked the talk and walked the walk for 44 years.

BS

The older I get, the less tolerance I have for BS. Of. any. kind.

Retired

My mentor retired yesterday. She was someone I looked to for support, guidance, advice and most importantly, friendship.

My work life will never be the same.

Sometimes

I feel like I'm still in middle school.

Middle school, which was junior high back when I was in school, sucked. I didn't get most of what my peers were talking about .... tv shows, teen idols, etc etc etc. This not getting it sometimes left me feeling sad and frustrated while at other times, smug. Smug because I didn't watch the "crap" shows my peers were watching or listen to the teen beat music my peers listened to. I also didn't get caught up in the who was friends with who (today). No no no, I was different.

Smug is defined as... adjective, smug·ger, smug·gest.
1.
contentedly confident of one's ability, superiority, or correctness; complacent.

So instead of feeling sad/frustrated/less then, I felt superior and confident? While I wouldn't say confident, I did feel somewhat superior. I felt more grown up in that I intereacted more with adults and listened to music that adults listened to and read books that adults read.

So why do I feel like I'm still in middle school? Now instead of feeling smug, I mostly feel confused and left out. I still don't understand why some people are liked and others are not. Most of the time, the people I really like, really connect with, are not viewed as being "in". I continue to not understand most of my peers, especially the parents of my sons classmates.

I am slowly and painfully coming to the realization that I will never fit in with them nor will they ever like me. Most days I'm ok with that. But some days, the unease I feel is palpable.
1.
readily or plainly seen, heard, perceived, etc.; obvious; evident: a palpable lie; palpable absurdity.
2.
capable of being touched or felt; tangible.

I'm working on finding my smug.

My Birthday

I had the best day yesterday. Every few years, my birthday coincides with Mother's Day, and yesterday was one of those days.

After having a terrible argument with my husband Saturday night(can you say I am a hormonal bitch), I went to bed feeling pretty down. However, Sunday couldn't have turned out better if I do say so myself.

My oldest son went to church with me and sight read the choir anthem. He didn't even grumble when I woke him up! He blesses me so much everyday and continues to amaze with his loving spirit. My middle boy went with my husband to pick out my birthday/mother's day present. He spent some of his hard earned money on part of my present. He is generous and quick to tell me he loves me and still wants to spend time with me! My youngest son helped vacuum and clean the house. He was impressed with my birthday present and wanted to know when he could use it(typical of a 10 year old I'd say).

My boys(husband included) bought me an iPod touch! It is amazing! Alex helped me load music and Sean got the wireless internet going so we could try out the wifi.

After a meal of fajitas and red velvet cake, I feel into bed and said my nightly prayer of... thank you God for letting me be part of this amazing family.

Baby, baby

My baby is 17 today. Last night was his junior prom. He looked so handsome in his tuxedo. His date wore a darling dress - not to mention her todiefor shoes. At the after prom party, Alex won $100! I told him it was his lucky night.

Alex was a wonderful, easy baby. He slept through the night at a very young age, nursed like a champion and changed my life in so many amazing ways.

He was a happy go lucky toddler and preschooler. Very curious, very engaged in learning and very smart! He taught himself how to read and hasn't quit reading since.

He has not been a big fan of school for many years. We think it's because school is not really made for boys. Being the son of a teacher can't be easy for someone that sees through the BS of the public school system.

As a young man, Alex is very open minded and has lots of ideas and thoughts on a variety of subjects. He is VERY liberal in his thinking and beliefs ( Ü ) and is quick to debate with others why they should be too. He is incredibly musically talented and plays guitar and sings like a man much older than his years.

Alex is happy. He has many great friends and enjoys being alive. He isn't afraid to be himself anexpress his thoughts and ideas. I admire his confidence and determination. I like to think that his father and I have made a good home for him to grow up in. That we let him find out who he is and what that means - that we didn't try to make him into what we wanted.

I am a proud mother. I am so blessed to have had this young man in my life for the past 17 years. I can't wait to see what he does next!

Happy birthday Alex. I love you.

Loving what I do and doing what I love

I experienced pure joy last night. I was singing and suddenly realized how happy and free I felt. After not feeling that way for some time, it was nice to get my mojo back.

Unconditional Love

I've made a discovery. It's nothing new and I've known about this for some time. But now, I know.

As a child from a dysfunctional family, my understanding of what is normal is screwed up. I don't want to get into the whole discussion of what is normal, blah blah blah. I do want to talk about love and how in my family it was witheld and conditional.

My feelings were not regarded in the context of knowing something was wrong and unjust and that instead of anything being fixed or changed, I was ignored and shamed. My feelings of self-preservation were noted as me being a bitch and again, I was shamed. I 'm not talking about me getting my way or being allowed to do what I wanted to do. No, I'm talking about my body being my own and having boundaries that were healthy. Knowing that my parents loved me for being me and for being their child. I never felt safe. Never felt ok with being in my own body. Never felt ok just being me.

I've never felt loved like that. Not by my parents. And this weekend, I saw how it continues to affect me. How unhealthy and off-center I still am/can be. I am going to be 45 in one month and I am STILL hounded by my unhealthy childhood.

ugh.

So, unconditional love. I will work everyday to love myself unconditionally and make damn sure that my own children know that I love them in the manner that I deserved and didn't get. No shaming, no demeaning, no belittling.

Love is all you need. Love is all I need.

Orlando

What a trip. Quite interesting for a variety of reasons. Traveling with people you don't "really" know is difficult and stressful.

The weather however was gorgeous. Absolutely, positively gorgeous.

I don't know how

I'm going to tell my youngest boys why I couldn't come to the movie with them.

Today I had to do one of the hardest things I've done in a long, long time. My oldest called to tell me our cat was not acting well. He was crying and that was my cue to come directly home.

I was on my way to meet my boys at the theater. They were already there with friends and I was to join them. Instead, I took my oldest and our cat to the vet where we had to have the conversation about what to do with our desperately ill cat.

Watching a 16 year old cry is awful. Yes, I've seen him cry before, but this time, it was painful.

Part of having pets(in my adult mind) is knowing that they can get sick and die and cost a lot of money, etc etc etc. But, we still take all of this on because the joy and love they give and bring to your family is so worth the price.

Except today, having to make the decision to put our cat down and having my son hear me make that decision was ... I can't even think of a word strong enough to describe the heartache.

Maci was loved. My sons loved her, my husband loved her and I loved her. She was a different cat, not very friendly except on her terms(similar to my 16 and 12 year old). Even though she was with us a short time, we will miss her.

I'm so tired

(I feel like) I haven't slept a wink. (anyone get it?)

I need to change my life. I'm not happy with how I look or feel.

The time has come.

Spring Break '08

This spring break is working out well so far. It's warm enough to play outside and have the windows open during mid day. Also warm enough to wear shorts with a sweat shirt.

My job for this break is to clean out my garage. I don't want this job and can't seem to get anyone to let me quit. ugh.

Yes We Can

Have you seen this yet?

http://ca.youtube.com/watch?v=jjXyqcx-mYY

I have to post the link because I'm a dork and I don't know how else to post a video.

anyway.... enjoy!

I voted yesterday.

While I was at the polling place, a woman came in to vote and said she had forgotten her id and didn't have anything on her but her cell phone to prove who she was. They let her vote anyway.

They. let. her. vote. anyway.

If a bunch of older women(older women running the polling place) will break the rules so BLATANTLY, why do we all act so surprised when children, youth, adults, etc... break rules. Why?

Bite Me and Color Me Proud

This illness that I have- the crud, cold, walking-death, plague, WHATEVERTHEHELL it is, can bite me.

ugh.

I spent the entire weekend(except for the funeral and church) in bed. I haven't done that since I was on bed rest with my last baby and he is working on being 10 years old in May. While in bed, I did get some great reading in. I read "The Other Boleyn Girl" and loved loved loved it.

Reading that book made me reflct on how glad I am that I live in the time that I do. Not only did I get to marry the man I fell in love with, I got to decide on my major in college, apply for MY OWN credit cards, and raise my children in the manner that their father and I think is best.

My 2 oldest boys played guitar and sang in church this past Sunday. Middle son is just learning how to play guitar. He's been singing in the shower the songs his praise band played on Sunday. My heart was full listening to him sing(he would kill me if he knew I was listening). My oldest boy played and sang one of my favorite songs ever- "Doubting Thomas" by Chris Thiele. Oldest was amazing. I am so proud of him.

Of course the whole time I sat there and watched them do their thing, I was miffed that I had forgotten my camera at home. But this way, instead of looking at them through a camera, I got to watch with my eyes and listen with my heart.

I'll ask the youth director for pictures.

Bold What You've Done

01. Seen the Grand Canyon
02. Swam with wild dolphins
03. Climbed a mountain:
04. Taken a Ferrari for a test drive
05. Been inside the Great Pyramid
06. Held a tarantula
07. Taken a candlelit bath
08. Said “I love you” and meant it
09. Hugged a tree
10. Bungee jumped
11. Visited Paris
12. Watched a lightning storm at sea
13. Stayed up all night long and saw the sun rise
14. Seen the Northern Lights
15. Gone to a huge sports game
16. Walked the stairs to the top of the leaning Tower of Pisa
17. Grown and eaten your own vegetables
18. Touched an iceberg
19. Slept under the stars literally.
20. Changed a baby’s diaper
21. Taken a trip in a hot air balloon
22. Watched a meteor shower
23. Eaten alligator
24. Given more than you can afford to charity
25. Looked up at the night sky through a telescope
26. Had an uncontrollable giggling fit at the worst possible moment
27. Had a food fight
28. Bet on a winning horse
29. Asked out a stranger
30. Had a snowball fight
31. Screamed as loudly as you possibly can
32. Held a lamb
33. Seen a total eclipse
34. Ridden a roller coaster
35. Hit a home run
36. Danced like a fool and not cared who was looking
37. Adopted an accent for an entire day
38. Actually felt happy about your life, even for just a moment
39. Had two hard drives for your computer
40. Visited all 50 states
41. Been to Austria
42. Had amazing friends
43. Danced with a stranger in a foreign country
44. Watched whales
45. Stolen a sign
46. Backpacked in Europe
47. Taken a road-trip
48. Gone rock climbing
49. Taken a midnight walk on the beach
50. Gone sky diving
51. Visited Ireland
52. Been heartbroken longer than you were actually in love
53. In a restaurant, sat at a stranger’s table
54. Visited Japan
55. Milked a cow
56. Alphabetized your CDs
57. Pretended to be a superhero
58. Sang karaoke top four favorite karaoke songs?
59. Lounged around in bed all day
60. Played touch football
61. Gone scuba diving
62. Kissed in the rain
63. Played in the mud
64. Played in the rain
65. Gone to a drive-in theater
66. Visited the Great Wall of China
67. Started a business
68. Fallen in love and not had your heart broken
69. Toured ancient sites
70. Taken a martial arts class
71. Played D&D for more than 6 hours straight
72. Gotten married (18 years and counting…)
73. Been in a movie
74. Crashed a party
75. Gotten divorced
76. Gone without food for 5 days
77. Made cookies from scratch
78. Won first prize in a costume contest
79. Ridden a gondola in Venice
80. Gotten a tattoo
81. Rafted the Snake River
82. Been on television news programs as an “expert”
83. Gotten flowers for no reason
84. Performed on stage
85. Been to Las Vegas
86. Recorded music
87. Eaten shark
88. Kissed on the first date
89. Gone to Thailand
90. Bought a house
91. Been in a combat zone - does my family room count? Ü
92. Been in a marching band
93. Been on a cruise ship
94. Spoken more than one language fluently (French, but not really fluently)
95. Performed in Rocky Horror
96. Raised children
97. Followed your favorite band/singer on tour
98. Passed out cold
99. Taken an exotic bicycle tour in a foreign country
100. Picked up and moved to another city to just start over
101. Driven on the Golden Gate Bridge
102. Sang loudly in the car, and didn’t stop when you knew someone was looking (DAILY)
103. Had plastic surgery
104. Survived an accident that you shouldn’t have survived
105. Wrote articles for a large publication
106. Lost over 100 pounds - not 100 but quite a bit of weight
107. Ridden on a boat down the Danube River
108. Piloted an airplane
109. Touched a stingray
110. Broken someone’s heart
111. Helped an animal give birth
112. Won money on a T.V. game show
113. Broken a bone
114. Dyed your hair
115. Shaved your head
116. Caused a car accident
117. Been elected to public office
118. Skipped all your school reunions
119. Built your own PC from parts
120. Gone back to school
121. Read the Iliad and the Odyssey (Just the Odyssey)
122. Ridden a horse
123. Eaten Kangaroo meat
124. Had stitches and staples
125. Toured castles in Europe England and Scotland.
126. Had your picture in the newspaper
127. Eaten sushi
128. Sold your own artwork to someone you didn’t know
129. Published a book
130. Written poetry
131. Had a facial part pierced other than your ears
132. Fired a rifle, shot gun or pistol
133. Had major surgery
134. Had a snake as a pet
135. Gone on an African safari
136. Eaten mushrooms that were gathered in the wild
137. Visited more foreign countries than US states
138. Visited all 7 continents
139. Lived in a foreign country for more than a year
140. Been swimming in the Atlantic and Pacific Oceans
141. Been to Niagara Falls
142. Lived on both sides of the Mississippi river
143. Sang in a foreign language in front of an audience .
144. Been to the Berlin Wall
145. Taught a child to read
146. Been a DJ (Just in my own home

It's Been 18 Years

18 years ago today, I told the man I loved that I wanted to spend the rest of my life with him.

I still do.